There are still actual people voting Democrat, and here’s why


Wondering why people actually still vote for Democrats? Believe it or not, there are still Democrat voters out there and we’ve compiled their top reasons for doing so!

__  They’re dead: Hard to object to candidates like Joe Biden when you are no longer alive!

__ They’re Drag Queens worried about losing their God-given right to dance in underwear in front of kids: It’s in The Constitution.

__ Still holding out for one of those free Obama phones: An iPhone 6! NICE!

__ To convince others that they aren’t Christian Nationalists: They’re one of the “good” Christian

__ Their mail-in ballot was already filled out in permanent marker: Now that’s strange! Mail-in voting is the most secure kind of voting!

__ Government spending and taxes make them feel all warm and fuzzy inside: As if we know how to spend our own money. The government knows best!