‘Dying wish’: Deeply-moving justification for widespread voting irregularities revealed


The Biden campaign has revealed Joe Biden’s dying wish: to be elected president. According to spokespeople, Biden’s loved ones gathered around him as he laid on his bed in the basement and whispered, “Just… let… me… be… president… of the…. aggggggh….”

Eventually, they figured out what he meant: his dying wish was to beat Trump and become president of the United States. The campaign is calling for no more recounts or legal challenges to help the old man receive his dying wish.

“According to the Constitution, we must respect the dying wishes of prominent Democrats,” said a Biden campaign spokesperson.