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Tuesday, May 18, 2010     INTELLIGENCE BRIEFING

The nation's capital is no longer the people's town

By Nancy Morgan

If you're one of those Americans like me who live in fly-over country, I have news for you. Our nation's capitol is now pretty much off-limits to you.

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Last week I had business in Washington, D.C. and planned a few extra days to re-acquaint myself with our nation's history and a city I once loved to visit. It turned out to be the week from hell.

My first mistake was driving my SUV. The beltway encircling D.C. resembles a scene from Dante's Inferno. Fellow drivers inside the beltway were just plain rude. All of them. As a result of being unable to change lanes, I missed my exit and spent the next two hours wandering narrow streets rife with 'No Left Turn' and 'One Way' signs. I started getting a bit anxious.


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Finally making it to the hotel, I found that there were no smoking rooms available, despite my specific reservation. I figured if I'm spending $300.00 for a room, plus an extra $30.00 for my car, I should be able to do what I want. Not so. Smoking in my room would incur a $300.00 fine.

Logging onto the Internet I found that there were no rooms available anywhere in D.C. Hotel rooms cost an average of $350.00 per night. Quite affordable if the government or lobbying firms foot the bill, but quite out of my league. Alas.

Having decided to shorten my stay, I ventured out the next day to get in as much sightseeing as I could. I quickly found myself wandering in a sea of bureaucrats. I was awed to be in the presence of so many important people (in DC, everyone is, or acts, important). The majority of them had furrowed brows as if the weight of the world was on their shoulders. And they were all focused intensely, on themselves.

D.C. is a beautiful city. Our monuments are awe-inspiring and the sense of history is overwhelming. Unfortunately, the culture in D.C. is not welcoming to regular Americans.

D.C. has been taken over by those who seek power and influence. It has a very clear social hierarchy, as do most cities. Unless you're rich, famous, powerful or an insider, you're no one. Just the poor sucker whose taxes pay for it. What sets this city apart, however, is that they make absolutely no effort to hide it. Egos have replaced good manners.

Tourists are barely tolerated and largely unacknowledged. The only smiles I received were from fellow diners as I committed the social sin of giving thanks to God for the meal I was about to receive. And those smiles were condescending sneers.

The city itself is imploding. The infrastructure is falling apart. Traffic is a nightmare, parking is non-existent and hotel accommodations are available only to those willing to spend their life savings. D.C. is no longer for the people. Its for power players jockeying to get close to the seat of power. The power culture is toxic and infectious.

As a conservative, I seldom criticize something without offering a solution. Here's what I would suggest as a sure fire way to remake our nation's capitol back into the people's capitol.

Since Obama is into redistribution, I suggest we redistribute D.C. With the exception of the White House, Supreme Court and Congress, how about we take all the government agencies and parcel them out to the states. Hey, South Carolina would get a much needed shot in the economic arm if say, the CBO and the FDA moved here from D.C.

Other agencies like the FDA, the IRS, the CIA, etc. would immediately achieve tremendous cost savings by relocating their headquarters to fly-over country. Thus freeing up buildings that could be used to house people like myself who want to visit D.C. Call it affirmative action for tourists.

The benefits of redistributing D.C. to the states are enormous. The immediate results of this plan would mean thousands of government bureaucrats, instead of spending all their time jockeying to be close to the seat of power, might just be reduced to actually reading the bills they keep churning out.

Hey, the bureaucrats would even have to live under the rules they are imposing on everyone else. They would also be exposed to 'diverse' cultures (as in 'outside the beltway') with a good chance of adopting some cultural traits from their fellows. Traits like good manners, consideration for others and other multi-American traits.

Until and unless we're successful in redistributing the power in D.C., I'm going to keep renewing my travel alert against travel to D.C. to all residents of flyover country. I suggest instead that you vacation in South Carolina, where residents smile naturally. Besides that, we've got tons of parking, affordable hotels and a refreshing lack of very important people.

Nancy Morgan is a columnist and news editor for conservative news site RightBias.com. She lives in South Carolina.




Comments


Washington, D.C. is fine as long as you stick with the monuments and get a hotel in the free enterprise zones across the Potomac in Virginia. The Metro used to be okay, Phillip, but quite a few people died in accidents last year. And then the infallible Washington Post reported today that a man rode the system for 5 hours yesterday with much of that time spent being dead. The infallible bureaucrats are now investigating how that could have happened: "It was also unclear why the man was not spotted when the train was inspected before being taken out of service at one point. Metro said it would review its procedures." You can't make this stuff up.

Walter Winchell III      12:31 a.m. / Thursday, May 20, 2010


I have to disagree with Nancy Morgans piece on Washington D.C.. I took my family (middleclass,conservative) to D.C. on Easter weekend and had a great time. Sure, the hotel was expensive but that's D.C.. We were five blocks from the White House (walked). I did not rent a car, but they have a great subway system. Also, the crowds were fine (I didn't want to socialize with everyone on the street).

Phillip J. Waterwall      10:30 a.m. / Wednesday, May 19, 2010

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