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Lindows vs. Windows: The death of trademarks?

By Scott McCollum
SPECIAL TO WORLD TRIBUNE.COM
March 20, 2002

Linux operating system maker ÒLindowsÓ says that they werenÕt trying to confuse consumers with ÒWindowsÓ with their productÕs name. Apparently the similarities between ÒLindowsÓ and ÒWindowsÓ were just an amazing coincidenceÉ

Imagine for a moment itÕs a lazy Saturday summer afternoon. You walk into a Best Buy and browse the computer section. You see two green boxes in the ÒOperating SystemsÓ software category; both are similar sizes with similar graphics and fronts. One says ÒRuns all Windows software! Only $99 ø Full version included. NOT an upgradeÓ in an explosion-shaped sticker affixed to the upper-right hand corner of the box. The other says: Ò$99 Upgrade for users of previous installed and licensed versions of Microsoft Windows 98 or Windows Millennium.Ó YouÕre going to pick the $99 full version because you know a good deal when you see it.

You wonÕt notice until you get home that you just bought a cut-rate version of Linux called ÒLindowsÓ dressed up to look like Microsoft Windows XP. The box said that it runs all Windows software, but as soon as you have trouble with installing Microsoft PictureIt on your ÒLindowsÓ PC, it crashes. When you call Lindows support, they ask you for a serial number and a major credit card. Lindows is NOT and upgrade and the support for it is NOT free. Still think that was a good deal?

This is something that is going to happen in Best Buy stores around the United States in a few months. A lawsuit protecting consumers from this questionable marketing strategy was thrown out by a California judge this week in favor of the company that makes Lindows. Mike Robertson, the CEO of Lindows, made a statement that Lindows was not trying to confuse consumers with Windows. Robertson, you may remember, was the founder of MP3.com ø the CEO that grabbed plenty of free-flowing Silicon Valley venture capital, set up a Napster-style dot-com to steal copyrighted music, was called to testify before Congress, saw his company sinking and deployed his golden parachute. The judge agreed with Robertson, said Microsoft was the bad guy for filing a lawsuit to protect consumers (and their trademarked ÒWindowsÓ name) and hinted that ÒWindowsÓ probably shouldnÕt be protected as a trademark either.

Let me show you an example of the absurdity of all this:

I want to make and sell PCs with all-red components. Red motherboards, red video cards, CD-RW drives, cases, monitors - the works! I'll put Red Hat Linux on it to keep with my red theme. All red PCs! Now, thatÕs innovation! I want Ôem to look like big red apples. Say, that's a good name for my new company ø Apple. With a name like that everyone will remember my companyÕs name.

Once I get my new PCs built, I'll give them apple sounding names like ÒGala,Ó ÒRed DeliciousÓ and ÒMacintosh.Ó Boy, why do those slow, Old Economy companies spend so much money on marketing when I just think this stuff up on my cigarette break? Whoa! Too bad those idiot big companies never recognized my creativity. ItÕs their loss because my new Apple Macintosh computer is gonna roll over those big dinosaur companies like Dell and IBM!

However, when I went public with my plans, some big money corporate jerk named Steve Jobs filed a lawsuit against me. He said that he already owned the name "Apple" and I couldn't call my company or computer by the apple name! Have you ever heard of anything so ridiculous? Does this guy think he owns all the apples in the world? You can't own a name like ÒappleÓ because apples are common! You canÕt register a trademark for something so common as an ÒappleÓ because that would mean that nobody could ever own any apples ever again! That goes against everything the Founding Fathers of the US Constitution worked to create! One man or corporation canÕt own the name ÒMacintoshÓ because it's a type of apple and it's the name of a kilt-wearing dude I saw on ÒBraveheart!Ó What if I wanted to call my company ÒMacintosh Computers,Ó whatÕs this Steve Jobs guy gonna do about it?

IÕll hire a left-wing lawyer that will say anything to absolve me of any wrongdoing. Yeah, a lawyer like Larry Lessig who knows that copyright protections are not conductive to innovation! Larry is a teacher at Stanford and is smart because he knows that real innovations like the wheel or paper came from communes, not research and development funds. They didnÕt need corporate hierarchies to think great thoughts and there were no corporations trying to control information about great discoveries! Information must be free like open source information is! I'm going to open source the name ÒApple MacintoshÓ for all to use! We cannot let lawyers control our lives and corporations take away our civil liberties!

Yes, trademarks and copyrights are morally wrong according to the people that run Lindows.com, Incorporated. Strange that the victory statement sent to the press from RobertsonÕs Lindows.com, Incorporated had: ÒLindowsOS and Lindows.com are trademarks of Lindows.com, Inc. Linux¨ is a registered trademark of Linus Torvalds. Microsoft¨ Windows operating system is a registered trademark or service mark of the Microsoft Corporation.Ó I guess thatÕs why Lindows.com, Inc. didnÕt bother to register their name like other businesses. Then again, maybe they knew they wouldnÕt last long?

What a bunch hypocritical, snotty, little know-it-all savages these Òinformation should be freeÓ limousine leftists are! There will be no trademarks, copyrights or intellectual protections of any kind if Lessig and Robertson get their way. It won't be long before Microsoft will be forced to give up Windows as a trademark. Follow that with Apple giving up the Macintosh. Scott McNealy had better get ready to give up ÒJavaÓ and his companyÕs name because we all know that nobody can own ÒSun.Ó If only we can break the chains of intellectual property in America, we can live the free-as-in-liberty life of the workerÕs paradise. Oh, wretched and precious life of the noble savage!

I donÕt know about you, but I canÕt wait! I also canÕt wait to read your emailed comments. <>

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